It is very common for dads to feel as if they might be replaced or pushed aside if he and his partner choose to hire a doula. But, the reality is that the idea of fathers in the delivery room is a very recent expectation. For many years, dads have been the keepers of the waiting room - pacing the floors and grabbing updates from hurried nurses until the announcement finally came that he was the proud father of a new baby boy or baby girl. Then he was brought into the room where his tired wife was sitting up in bed holding a clean baby all wrapped up in a blanket with a hat on. Fathers were not around for the tougher parts of labor and delivery. No, this is a new scene for dads.
Doulas, on the other hand, have played a critical role in childbirth for many years. While we all have different levels of experience and years of service under our belts, we have all been trained from the knowledge and wisdom passed down from the generations of birth workers before us. We truly love what we do and we are constantly seeking new information and tricks to help us help you. You read that right! Doulas are here to help you too! So without further ado, here are the top 5 reasons that doulas are for dads, too.
Doulas, on the other hand, have played a critical role in childbirth for many years. While we all have different levels of experience and years of service under our belts, we have all been trained from the knowledge and wisdom passed down from the generations of birth workers before us. We truly love what we do and we are constantly seeking new information and tricks to help us help you. You read that right! Doulas are here to help you too! So without further ado, here are the top 5 reasons that doulas are for dads, too.
1. For doulas, childbirth is a way of life. We are always reading, meeting, and sharing different tips, tricks, and methods with our fellow doulas. We attend training seminars to learn new techniques and add new skills to our "tool box". We live, eat, and breathe all things related to pregnancy and childbirth. This way, when we are with a mother in labor, all the things we learn don't fly out the window. We remember the things we teach you in childbirth class so you don't have to! I'm sure you will pay very close attention to all the things your educator says in class..... But wouldn't it be nice to have someone to gently remind you of a comfort technique or a position that may have slipped your mind? That's what we are here for!
2. Doulas are a team mate, not a replacement for the important people in this baby's life. When everything is said and done, we will go back home to our families and you will stay with your new baby and his or her mother. This is something that no one can ever change, no matter what their role in the birth of your child. During labor, your partner will look to YOU to be the steady rock that holds her and loves her. Doulas help facilitate that bond by moving with you and helping you move together. While she leans on your for support, your doula will massage her back or squeeze her hips. While you hold her, your doula will speak words of comfort and encouragement - and she will believe her because she knows the doula has been here before and knows that everything is normal and going well. There are things that only a father can provide for the mother of his child - doulas could never replace him. But there are also things that only a doula can provide for a mother to be. That's why dads and doulas are the perfect team!
3. A doula can give you a much needed break! Labor doesn't take breaks for sleep or meal time. It can be long and tiring. Doulas are there for all of it. We have back up doulas for extra long labors, so you know you will always have someone there who is well rested and able to help. This allows dads to catch a quick nap or snack while the doula helps the mother relax and rest. You don't have to worry about being in 2 or 3 places at once because the doula is right there to be by your partners side. We can even make a run to the cafeteria for you if you really don't want to leave your partner. Whatever you need, we are there to help make it happen!
4. Doulas can help you become super dad. It is easy for someone to be especially good at something when they are confident in their ability to do the thing. As mentioned earlier, doulas remember all the stuff from childbirth class, even if you don't. So, when the time for birth comes, we can help you remember and maybe even show you a few new things. If there is ever a time during labor that you are unsure or have a question, your doula will be there to answer and offer advice. Sometimes all it takes is a smile and a not to ease your fears. When you are confident in your ability to help your partner, you will do things you never thought you would be able to do! After your baby is born and the doula leaves, your partner will not remember the doula whispering a tip in your ear. She will remember how wonderful it felt for you to know exactly what she needed without her having to ask.
5. Above all, every dad to be's main concern is having a healthy mom and a healthy baby. Studies have shown many times that having a doula present at your birth can help achieve both. It is interesting to note that there are many things you can do to have a healthy mom and there are many things you can do to have a healthy baby. But, a doula is one of the few investments you can make that will impact both. Doulas can help reduce the need for interventions such as pitocin, IV narcotics, epidurals, forceps, and cesarean section, all while decreasing the time that a mother is in labor. Babies who's mothers had a doula can also have higher APGAR scores after birth and have an easier time breastfeeding soon after birth. To quote the Cochrane review, "Continuous support during labour has clinically meaningful benefits for women and infants and no known harm. All women should have support throughout labour and birth."
As an added bonus, the Cochrane review showed that women who labored with a doula were more satisfied with their birth experience overall. And everyone in the south knows - If momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!
2. Doulas are a team mate, not a replacement for the important people in this baby's life. When everything is said and done, we will go back home to our families and you will stay with your new baby and his or her mother. This is something that no one can ever change, no matter what their role in the birth of your child. During labor, your partner will look to YOU to be the steady rock that holds her and loves her. Doulas help facilitate that bond by moving with you and helping you move together. While she leans on your for support, your doula will massage her back or squeeze her hips. While you hold her, your doula will speak words of comfort and encouragement - and she will believe her because she knows the doula has been here before and knows that everything is normal and going well. There are things that only a father can provide for the mother of his child - doulas could never replace him. But there are also things that only a doula can provide for a mother to be. That's why dads and doulas are the perfect team!
3. A doula can give you a much needed break! Labor doesn't take breaks for sleep or meal time. It can be long and tiring. Doulas are there for all of it. We have back up doulas for extra long labors, so you know you will always have someone there who is well rested and able to help. This allows dads to catch a quick nap or snack while the doula helps the mother relax and rest. You don't have to worry about being in 2 or 3 places at once because the doula is right there to be by your partners side. We can even make a run to the cafeteria for you if you really don't want to leave your partner. Whatever you need, we are there to help make it happen!
4. Doulas can help you become super dad. It is easy for someone to be especially good at something when they are confident in their ability to do the thing. As mentioned earlier, doulas remember all the stuff from childbirth class, even if you don't. So, when the time for birth comes, we can help you remember and maybe even show you a few new things. If there is ever a time during labor that you are unsure or have a question, your doula will be there to answer and offer advice. Sometimes all it takes is a smile and a not to ease your fears. When you are confident in your ability to help your partner, you will do things you never thought you would be able to do! After your baby is born and the doula leaves, your partner will not remember the doula whispering a tip in your ear. She will remember how wonderful it felt for you to know exactly what she needed without her having to ask.
5. Above all, every dad to be's main concern is having a healthy mom and a healthy baby. Studies have shown many times that having a doula present at your birth can help achieve both. It is interesting to note that there are many things you can do to have a healthy mom and there are many things you can do to have a healthy baby. But, a doula is one of the few investments you can make that will impact both. Doulas can help reduce the need for interventions such as pitocin, IV narcotics, epidurals, forceps, and cesarean section, all while decreasing the time that a mother is in labor. Babies who's mothers had a doula can also have higher APGAR scores after birth and have an easier time breastfeeding soon after birth. To quote the Cochrane review, "Continuous support during labour has clinically meaningful benefits for women and infants and no known harm. All women should have support throughout labour and birth."
As an added bonus, the Cochrane review showed that women who labored with a doula were more satisfied with their birth experience overall. And everyone in the south knows - If momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!
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