So you’re expecting a baby. They’ve given you a due date, sent you for tests, scheduled your prenatals… So many decisions are being made…

Wait…

Who should be deciding about the particulars of your pre-natal care?  Your birth experience? Your post-partum course? Who, ultimately, is in charge of your physical health, mental health, sexual health, and the health of your baby?

…Let’s try that again: REWIND<<<<

So you’re expecting a baby. You’ve determined your due date, chosen what tests to take, scheduled your prenatal visits. There are so many decisions for you to make…

Do you want to be a passenger or the captain? The first mate or the private? Not sure? Consider this:

I had plans for the launch of this blog right about now… but that was before this Covid-19 global pandemic. Still, if there is one universal truth about doulas, it’s that we are used to adapting to the unpredictability of life. Since we never know when our client is going to go into labor - what will be interrupted, what will have to be rescheduled, postponed or canceled - we know how to do unpredictable.

So - Some thoughts about the importance of “visitors” to birth-givers in the hospital setting.

When Covid-19 cases started rising exponentially in the USA in March, hospitals quickly decided to exclude all visitors. This decision was made in the midst of chaos and panic with a laser focus on infection control, because the immediate concern was preventing the spread of the virus in the hospitals, especially among the staff, nurses and doctors who were (and still are) risking their lives daily to save ours. We know that there wasn’t enough personal protective equipment (PPE) stockpiled to prepare for the sudden surge in need. Thus, without adequate PPE, other measures HAD to be taken to ensure our medical professionals could continue to do the work of attending to sick, and highly contagious patients. And when visitors were restricted, infection rates among these professionals immediately declined.

But when visitors were banned, did we throw out the proverbial baby with the bath water?

Health statistics are reported by race throughout our health tracking systems. Everywhere you look, in every measure, you can see that health outcomes for Black people are worse than for White people. Here’s a sample showing the differences, or disparities, in outcomes reported by race in the USA.

My lane is pregnancy, birth and breastfeeding, so I will focus this discussion there.

From life expectancy and diabetes, to infant mortality (death of a child before age one), Black outcomes are worse than White (1).

So is race a risk factor? Does being Black cause you to have poorer health? NO! Racism does that!

Time to take the gloves off.
I’ve been living in Birmingham, Alabama for 20 years now, working in the birth world as a childbirth educator, breastfeeding counselor, birth doula, birth doula trainer, and director of a small non-profit community doula program called BirthWell Partners (www.BirthWellPartners.org). In all of these spaces I have tried to push against some of the gender-role stereotypes of a Southern woman: lead from behind, defer to others, don’t offend, and speak softly. Today, in my 56th year, it’s time I faced the facts, I’m not good at “Southern woman”, I don’t know how to do that!
I’m not bashing that subtle approach by any means. In fact, using that approach is how things get done around here! There are many advocates in the birth field in Alabama who continue to take this approach - and do so expertly. Their efforts over the past 20 years have made a huge difference. They are the trail blazers who smoothed the way for today’s doulas in the birth room. More recently, after ten years of work, they got legislation passed to license Certified Professional Midwives (CPMs) in AL, opening the door for you to have your baby at home with a licensed provider. For years I have aspired to be like these leaders in the birth field (you know who you are)! For a long time, I have fantasized about being able to carry one of y’all along with me and have you whisper the right words in my ear. Maybe I’ve improved, but basically, subtle and southern doesn’t fit me and I'm no good at it!
So, I’ve decided it’s time for me to stop trying to be that woman, and instead to embrace my strengths and style, however unconventional it may be. Because quitting isn’t an option. There is too much to do and too much that needs fixing!